Taking and giving

I have been forced to realize of late how much I have been given. At the same time, the realization of just how little I did to get what I have began to set in. Now, it is one thing to learn to trust and accept not being in control when all kinds of bad is going on. It is quite another to do this when it is all good and you have no control over it. That is where I am rite now.

At first, I thought to my self, I am slightly fearful that this will not last, that I will lose all this good, that all that suffering is just around the corner. Then I realized that this was a complete wast of time and a disease in and of itself.

These things don't really work like that. God is not about to drop the other foot. If good is going to happen, it is going to happen. Freedom was embraced and now there is security in that freedom. Even if it was to all fall apart, whatever. It was good while it lasted and it is all dust and shadows in the end. So what next?

All I could really say was, if I really have been given all this and I really did nothing for it and it is here to last, I had better do something to contribute to everyone around me however I can. Freely I have been given to the point of not having to worry. Freely I had better give to justify all this to me self at least. But that is arrogance in its own way. Without love I am nothing.

So how can I love? How can I give? How can I keep the blessing circulating and growing into reality? These are the questions I ask, and I expect interesting answers.